My life for the past months has been really well, there’s a few twist and turns from time to time but I managed. I must say that my system have fully coped up and embraced the way of living here in the UAE, thanks to my cousin and her friends I was able to go out of my shell and just be out there and gain new experiences. I also missed the feeling of “having fun”, mainly because at first I hesitated and denied myself the opportunity to experience it because I am not in my comfort zone. But as time goes by, I am being myself again – being young, carefree, and enjoying life. As I always say, “carpe diem.”
So here’s the story of my life so far.
➸Beach weekends. For a month and a half, we have spent out weekends on the beach. Every Thursday night we go to this kind of secluded beach in Ajman (free zone) to spend the night there – my aunt, Nella, Ate Jo my uncle’s brother and his daughter Bakoot, and his son Omar and his family. We do some barbecues, a little drinking (Nella, Ate Jo and I), and of course overnight swimming. It’s really a breath of fresh air after five days of being stressed at work; it’s really nice to spend one night thinking about nothing but just enjoying the moment. All of this was my aunt’s effort and I really appreciate her for being the way she is to us. She’s very caring and thoughtful, and not really “strict”. So aside from being away from my family, things like these makes me feel that I am home.
➸Sunrise and waves. Who wouldn’t fall in love waking up to such beautiful sunrise and the calm roar of the waves in the morning? I don’t know about you but I honestly love waking up to such kind of beauty. I can’t even take my eyes off it while we’re on the road, and that’s something that I really look forward every weekend. Such beauty keeps me coming back for more.
➸ Keeping up with friends. Aside from my constant Skype weekends with my family, another thing that makes me feel “home” somehow is my friends’ effort to be updated and constantly keeping up with each other’s lives. MV and I are constantly making video calls thru WeChat, despite the huge time difference; I’m glad that we can manage. Mommy C sending pictures of baby G through WeChat and Messenger, which makes me miss them more because baby G is growing too fast and becoming more adorable each day. Same goes with the rest of CrooCroo loves, Kuya Erwin in Singapore, Larissa’s busy being on the theatre production team, Missy and Kriztal are also busy with their respective work. And just recently that I had a short conversations with Lian since USA and UAE has the biggest time difference, it’s really a challenge for us to even chat because the replies are one day late! I guess this is the toughest challenge for long distance friendships – challenge accepted!
➸ Letting go and starting anew. Upon Jade’s passing, I do believe that the heavens gained an additional angel on the team. It was one of the lowest points in my life that I chose to grieve in silence and just reminisce all what we had. It took me by surprise to receive such amount of care and emotional support from a person who I barely knew. I didn’t ask for this person to do so but he comforted me and made me feel that I am not alone. This person exerted an effort to at least ease the pain that I’m feeling during that time and then I realized, “maybe this person’s an angel in disguise and was sent to comfort me during this time.” Somehow, it makes me feel relieved. How I met this person you asked? It was roughly two months ago when someone sent me a random message on WeChat while I was talking with one of my friends. I don’t usually check and accept invites because I just don’t feel like it. But I don’t know what has gotten to me that night that I decided to check on this person’s profile and poof! I accepted the invitation. We started talking and to be honest, I rarely encountered someone who can speak English well (which is also the reason why I don’t usually talk/virtually meet people through messaging or social networking applications). At first I thought that this is just one of those “one – night conversations” between two bored people. Surprisingly, our conversations went on for hours, days, and until now. I don’t want to reveal any more information about this person, for now I want to keep it to myself (if you know what I mean). So my point is, it feels good to know someone, a random stranger for instance, and you’re on that stage of “getting to know each other” and not necessarily on a romantic level; the process itself feels good, getting to know someone and vice versa.
➸ In addition, I couldn’t be more thankful that my cousin allowed me to enter into her world. She treats me like an older sister and I treat her like mine too. Not only that, I get to know her closest friends and now I act like their big sister which for me is amazing!
➸ Spontaneous road trips. My family and friends knew how much I love random and spontaneous road trips. I just love being on the road! Thanks to my cousin and her “friends” because we get to have late night road trips going elsewhere. If the car has a turbo, well that’s a bonus already. I don’t know what’s with the city lights but they make me appreciate a city more during night time. It’s just so mesmerizing to see the sparkling lights, the buildings, even the roads – they’re all beautiful.
➸ I don’t know what’s with my eyes that makes Jawaher obsessive about it. She always insists on putting make up on my face, but I think her favorite feature really is my eyes. After several attempts and offers to make me over, I finally gave in but only for my eyes. She bought me a light blue contact lenses and put four various mascaras on my lashes and poof! Hello gorgeous eyes (yeah I’m claiming it already that my eyes are gorgeous too). Even my mom almost didn’t recognize me when I sent her the picture of my made – up eyes! Well, I haven’t really appreciated my eyes before because for me they’re small and the lashes are very short as well, so for me there’s nothing special about it. It became one of my insecurities even. But not anymore, thanks to Jawaher I came to realize that my eyes can be this beautiful too.
➸ Last but definitely not the least, it’s my mom’s birthday tomorrow. I don’t know what to feel, but definitely I’m a bit sad because I miss her so much and I want her to be happy on her birthday. Her birthday last year was so memorable because I got a hangover geez! It was a simple celebration but I know she’s happy. I just want her to be happy on her special day, but I guess I’ll just make it up to her next year on my vacation.
Oh wow! I had a pretty long story here and I have so much to be thankful for. Happy mid – week to all of you earthlings!♥
Maybe two months ago I asked my friends to share with me what are the top 5 lists of the things that they value the most in their life, the things, people, event, or merely just anything that they value so much they cannot live without so to speak. I have been meaning to publish this post but for whatever reasons I just didn’t feel like “it’s the right time” yet, until today.
But before going on to my list, I would like to share four lists from the people who took the time and effort to share what they value the most in their life.
From Paola Aquino, Professional Business Analyst and a very close friend of mine:
From Sir Antonio Ingles, Educator/Founder of Aral Pinoy and Full Time Faculty at DLS – CSB:
“There is a demand upon us to be a person of God, for others and for creation and there is a call to sacrifice on their behalf, to put aside selfishness and be committed for the cause of what will truly bring more ease in their lives (nakakaluwag) because in the final analysis and reflection: “anumang nakapag-uugnay sa Diyos, sa kapwa, sa sarili at sa kalikasan ay nakakapagpaluwag” (relationships with God, others, oneself and nature make for a life of ease.) In other words, “anumang nakapag-uugnay ay nakakapagpaluwag” (relationships make for a life of ease).
To know more about the Aral Pinoy, you may visit their official website.
From Frenz Jorisse Ilan, 16 year old College Student and a very close cousin of mine:
From Amlenur Bayot, fellow DLS – CSB Alumni and Center for Social Action Volunteer:
“Aside from my family and my faith ;) well i still have things that i can’t really live without:
So before I write down my own list, I would like to thank all of you for sharing with me the things that are dear to you and you considered valuable. To be honest, I was really amazed because I can feel that these things that you listed are really significant for all of you.
Without further ado, here goes mine.
It’s been week since I received the most devastating news this year – that I lost one of my dearest friends. Hence, I have decided to pour my heart on this post since her passing has made me re – evaluate the things that I value in my life.
This is the story of how we met.
It was May 2011, Internship/OJT period, I’ve decided to apply as an HR Intern in GIZ, the non - profit organization where my “terror professor” also works as an HR Manager. Luckily, I was chosen for a 6 - month internship contract.
This is where I met this free - spirited young lady named Jade Ayanna Fernandez. She’s tall, has mid - length hair, she has retainers, chinita eyes, slender/boyish body type, and always wears that freakingly cute smile.
A few days after, the whole team went for a 3-day teambuilding, and this is where I get to know her better. We became roommates for 3 days.
This is our first "roomie selfie" during our first night at the hotel. We were actually waiting for our co - interns to arrive together with our drinks.
She’s one of the sweetest girls I’ve known. In the office, she always put some sticky notes with random cute and sweet messages in it everywhere - under my laptop, at the back of my chair, on my planner, everywhere. She does that everyday, and funny because whenever I arrive at the office, it became my hobby to look for her notes everywhere. I still keep them on my planner.
Being born with a wanderlust soul, her "let’s do this!" attitude is one that I really admire about her. She’s a natural adventurer. She’s a tough cookie and never turndown challenge, specially if it has something to do with food (oh my! she maybe thin but she eats like a construction worker you’ll be asking where all the foods go).
Imprint a damaged teddy before throwing it away.
Take a cue from Australian artist Geoffrey Ricardo by applying a light coat of paint to the front of your kid’s teddy and pressing it against craft paper.
Turn one of your kid’s drawings into a key chain.
You can also turn a drawing into a softie.
Preserve your baby’s hospital hat and I.D. bracelet in an ornament.
Make a family yearbook.
Catalogue memorable items from each school year.
All you need are file folders and a filing cabinet or milk crate.
Another fun option is to make school memory boxes.
Keep an Ugly Photo Book.
Instead of throwing out or deleting unflattering photos, save them in a photo book! One day you and your kids will laugh hysterically as you flip through it.
Take humorously inappropriate photos to give to your kid upon graduating from high school.
Your kid will probably think you’re nuts, but also pretty damn funny.
Save ticket stubs to every show, concert, and game that you see together.
UNIQUE GLASS BEACH IN CALIFORNIA
The glass beach near Fort Bragg in California formed after the trash dumped there for years by local residents was pounded into sand by the surf. The dumping was eventually prohibited, but the glass sand remains.
HIDDEN BEACH IN MARIETA, MEXICO
This beach in Mexico is said to have formed after the Mexican government used the uninhabited islands for target practice in the 1900s.
MALDIVES BEACH THAT LOOKS LIKE STARRY NIGHT SKY
The lights on this beach in the Maldives are caused by microscopic bioluminescent phytoplankton, which give off light when they are agitated by the surf.
THE BEACH OF THE CATHEDRALS, RIBADEO, SPAIN
The stunning cathedral-like arches and buttresses of this beach in Spain were formed by pounding water over thousands upon thousands years.
PINK SAND BEACH, BAHAMAS
The idyllic pink sand of the Bahamas is pigmented by washed-up coral remnants, which are dashed and ground to tiny pieces by the surf.
EXTREME PLANE LANDINGS AT MAHO BEACH, SAINT MARTIN
The black volcanic sand on this Icelandic beach contrasts beautifully with the white and glassy chunks of ice.
interesting how the answers change as the men get younger
C U R R E N T L Y …
♥ reading tons of articles about super food ingredients and technical specifications of chocolate processing equipment. Feels like college thesis all over!
♥ writing this post and some other work – related tasks on my planner.
♥ listening to All About That Bass by Meghan Trainor. I’ve been obsessing with this song since last week, together with Crazy Stupid Love by Cheryl Cole, Not a Bad Thing by JT and Bailando of Enrique Iglesias. Hearts all over!
♥ thinking about making the biggest technology hop of my life by buying a decent iPhone 5. Well, i’m not really a techie person and it’s pretty expensive as well so deciding to finally purchase an iPhone would be a milestone for me.
♥ smelling the scent of ESCAPE perfume all over me. For a person who’s not into perfumes, other than my all time favorite CK One of course, I really like the scent of ESCAPE – feminine yet not too girly.
♥ wishing for another getaway this coming weekend. I’ve been spending weekends on the beach for three consecutive weekends already, and to be honest, i wouldn’t mind spending all weekends there, at least not until winter.
♥ hoping that everything will fall into their proper places, in God’s time.
♥ wearing body hugging long skirt in navy blue, i don’t know how to call it really; paired with purple cotton semi – cropped top which is a bit blousy in style and of course, my trusty pair of strapped sandals in black with hint of silver.
♥ loving the empowering and liberating (in a good way) feeling of being with myself and myself alone. Do the things I never thought I’d do in my life, exploring the wholeness of my entire being, testing my limitations, and do things that makes me question my beliefs but at the same time makes me stand firmly about my values in life. I must say that currently, I’m in the process of enriching and opening myself to possibilities. I guess breaking up with her is not a bad decision after all. At least I have all the time to myself now.
♥ wanting for this day to end already because I want to go home and take a good rest. I do believe two days is not enough.
♥ feeling happy and contented with respect to where my life is currently heading right now. I am not perfect but who is, right? I still do a lot of mistakes but it’s what makes me human. I may not be stinking rich but I have all the experiences that i earned from trying to live my life to the fullest. And i thank Him for that; i thank Him for taking good care of me always.
Hope you lovely earthlings are having a blast this weekend! Be safe and don’t forget to look up and thank Him for all the blessing. :)
August 12, 2014
I dreamt about you last night, no this morning I mean, exactly an hour before the alarm snooze. In my dreams I saw you yelling back at me, full of anger and overwhelming pain, and I’ve never seen myself so scared of someone in my entire life. I saw myself walking as fast as I could, with shaking hands. I don’t know but for whatever reason I don’t want you to be near me in any way. If that’s how much pain I’ve cost you, curse me then, do not forgive me, hate me for the rest of your life and wish not to see me again, or our paths to ever not cross again for that matter. Just like what I told you, shake it off, you’ll be fine.
It is never easy to fall in love with someone who’s emotionally bipolar. Emotionally Bipolar, is that even a legit mental or psychological term? Well, that’s how I describe my mental state when it comes to being in a relationship. Loving someone with a mental state like mine could be very frustrating; mentally tiring, disappointing, and can make you go insane even. I can go from the very loving, sweet, caring, bubbly, and thoughtful girlfriend today to a complete “look all the fucks I care” kind of bitch the next day. My personality exists on the both ends of the string, I can’t do middle. Loving someone like me is a very tough job and the worst thing that could happen is you regretting that you even dared yourself to fall in love with me only to get hurt at the end. This state, let me tell you, is also hard for me to explain and understand, well at least I had the creativity to give it a name for that matter. This past few weeks, or it’s been a month or two already that I’ve been this kind of person, a total opposite of the person you used to know and love, you might be asking questions like “who the hell are you?” or “what did you do to my girlfriend?” So here’s the list of the 10 things I know I recklessly made you feel, and maybe still feeling until now which I am sorry for.
I am sorry for making you feel like this, but I cannot be sorry for being an emotional bipolar because this is part of who I am. I know I am hard to love, but if you could just hold on for a little bit longer, maybe you’ll realize that I can be bearable at times, you’ll just have to be very patient with me because I might tend to push you away for so many times, although what I’ve been meaning to tell you is to stay by my side.
I wasn’t able to greet all of my friends a happy International Best Friend’s Day that’s why I’ve thought of writing this post and list down significant friends that have created an impact in my life by far. To be honest, this list cannot cover all of them for they’re so many. Just think of it as a pre - preview then.
Few snapshots from my spontaneous Friday roadtrip going to Abu Dhabi. I went there to pick up the package that my mom sent through our very good relative there. Since my uncle’s at work and my other cousin’s still sleeping, Chin, my aunt, and I have to take the public transportation going there. Bus ride from Sharjah to Abu Dhabi costs AED30.00 while going back costs only AED25.00 (I don’t know why is that).
The travel took roughly three hours and the ventilation inside the bus is not really very relaxing (or it’s just me being the meticulous kid that I am).
These photos were taken using Heaven (my trusty iTouch 4th Gen) which I always bring with me instead of my digital camera (because you know, much more handy).
This is basically my life so far and I’m looking forward for more spontaneous road trips and hopefully, a real hardcore summer activity sooner (which I badly need by the way). much love!
Abu Dhabi, UAE (2014)
Thank God for long weekend. I was able to be somehow productive at home, did a lot of Skype chikka with mom, was able to do some self – pampering stuff like manicure and pedicure which I haven’t done in ages already! Not to mention my body’s a bit sore from helping my cousin do some house chores, although it did me good actually because I burned some fats. Without further whatsoever, here are some snapshots of my life so far.
➸ Reminisced childhood memories when babe sent me this dragonfly that she caught on her camera while she and her friends are having a little reunion by the river. Nostalgic indeed! This picture reminded me that all the material things that I lack when I was a child was nothing as compared to all the life long memories that I have gained from living a simple yet adventurous life in the province.
➸ This random sketch that babe found on the balcony of their house. I’m so glad she found and sent it to me because then I had an idea as to what “gift or surprise” shall I make for her for our upcoming 6th month.
➸ Awakening my inner somewhat artistic soul. I really couldn’t boast of my art skills but when I’m in the mood, I can be pretty artistic too. Since we’re on LDR, I really dedicate time and exert effort in doing something “special” for her. I’m a sucker for gift giving and I totally suck at giving gifts, but I do love to put some personal touch on everything that I will give to the people that I love. For this month, and my mood allowed me to do so, I tried to sketch some of my favorite pictures of her and two of them are sketches of her and her most hated crab! Seriously, I was laughing the entire time I was doing the sketches because I could only imagine her reaction on the crab. I haven’t done sketching in ages and I must say, I think the output’s satisfactory. Hey! It’s the effort that counts right?
➸ She’s the type of girl who’s not really into sweet things and I’m pretty sure she’s not even aware that she’s being sweet sometimes. She sent me these flowers and asked me randomly, “I haven’t gave you flowers before right?” which of course is a yes because I haven’t received a single leaf or petal from her before. I found it too cute and sweet of her because it seems like the idea just came out of nowhere but then the act itself is too sweet for me. I don’t know if she’s even aware that what she did is so nakakakilig.
➸ Chasing sunset every day. It has become a part of my everyday life to try and catch some sunset on my way home, then babe and I will exchange shots afterwards. It’s amazing how you get to see the same sun everyday yet you get to feel different emotions upon seeing it, you know what I mean? It’s like they may be the same sunset, but the memories or the events that you can acquaint to it would vary from time to time, it changes everyday.
➸ So this sunflower grew out of our pet bird’s leftovers. I just find the situation quite amusing because I can relate her growth with the concept of adaptation. Isn’t it very challenging to adapt to an environment that is out of your comfort zone? Pretty scary yet the very thought of it excites me in a way that I wanted to be this sunflower – I can be thrown anywhere and still manage to live, bloom, and survive.
➸ Since I literally stayed inside the house the whole weekend, I decided to pay the front yard a visit. It was 6 o’clock in the afternoon when I decided to go out and these sparkly flashes of light caught my attention. It’s just so mesmerizing to see how they sparkle against the leaves and branches of the tree, so calm and so natural. Reminds me of home.
P.S. I wasn’t able to do some journal writing and updating of blog post ideas because I realized I have to give my eyes and brain a break from the computer and from anything that will further exhaust them. But Ramadan is fast approaching so maybe I’ll use my spare time during those days to totally have some journal lovin’ and blog posts updating. Much love! ♥